One year anniversary


So wordpress sent me a little message the other day, 8th of October, congratulating me on one year of my blog.

What a year.

I have come so far in the past year.

Over the course of the year I have also been in Psycho Therapy. We are in the wind down phase of it, I only have one more visit.

So it seems this is a good time for reflection.

This time last year I was lonely and sad. The only friend I had was a ffwb (former friend with benefits)

We actually I had just broken off the benefit part and we were taking a break in the friendship part of out relationship while we adjusted to the new dynamic.

I was still in a fog from the “break down” I had had.

I was angry, frustrated.

Basically I was lost.

I didn’t know who I was.

So I started a blog.

Here I was able to clear my thoughts, organise them.

By getting them out I was able clear my head. It I guess was a form of therapy it’s self.

I started following other blogs. For some reason I was drawn to ones who were about their lives in kinky.

It awoke again in me my needs. My need for submission. The need I have to be controlled.

They led me to a website were others of our kind could meet. The site describes it’s self as a facebook of kink. It’s much better than the ones I’d been on in the past which were just meat markets. Places where men just wanted to meet and fuck. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Hell, I did it a few times. Though looking back on those one night stands I was doing it to try and feel something.

The website led me to a local group. Which in turn led me to another. I now have a social life, something which I’ve never had before.

I now have friends. Both online and in real life. People I trust and can rely on. Again something I’ve never had.

I also managed to end a friend with benefits relationship better than I did with my ex. In fact the fwb and I still friends, but only friends.

I am more confident than I was 12 months ago.

I have a better idea of where I want to go and a better idea of how to get there.


The last 18 months have been a huge overhaul of my life and things are only getting better.


May the next 12 months be even better.


‘It’s legal for us to sell Yazidi women and children as sex slaves under Sharia law’

The Muslim Issue

We can sell Yazidi women and children as sex slaves because it’s God’s law says ISIS: Terror group says Sharia allows them to enslave ‘pagans’


Islamic State militants claim the capture, enslavement and sale of thousands of Yazidi women and children had been ordered by God in a magazine purportedly published by the terror group.

The latest issue of Dabiq was released yesterday and attempts to justify the militants’ snaring of thousands of innocent Yazidis during an assault on the Iraqi city of Sinjar in August.

Explaining why Yazidis have been sold into sex slavery while those from other groups have not, the magazine claims Islamic Sharia law allows the enslavement of innocent ‘polytheists and pagans’ but not of those the militants regard as simply heretical.

Tens of thousands of Yazidis were forced to flee for their lives –…

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I have a problem with passive aggressiveness. I’ve never seen myself as being an offender, but I realised today that I may have been guilty of it once or twice. And I mean once or twice. I like to think I’m pretty upfront about how I feel about things

I blame myself of course for these transgressions, but I also lay a little bit of blame at Facebook’s feet.  One for being thereand another for allowing unclear status updates to be posted .  Yes, I know I could delete my account, but I have years of photos on it that I’d rather not lose.

It’s my belief that in the days before Facebook, when we were upset with someone we had to talk to them about it if it really bothered us.  We had to pick up the phone in the 70s and 80s. In the 90s we may have sent an…

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4,000 girls kidnapped by Islamic state in Amerli sold as slaves. Women found raped and hanged from a pipe by cable wire.

The Muslim Issue

Young widow chooses suicide over marriage to Isis commander

Nicola Smith, Baghdad
Published: 7 September 2014, The Times

The Yazidis are at risk

The Yazidis are at risk (Adam Ferguson)

Nada Qasim, 20, had been a widow for 40 days when she put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger. Her suicide was prompted not by her husband’s death, but by her father’s attempt to make her marry a commander in Isis.

Nada’s story provides a glimpse of the cruelty Isis reserves for women amid growing reports of forced marriages, sexual slavery, kidnapping and young girls being bartered between fighters.

In a dusty, rundown suburb of Baghdad, her sister Fatima recalled how a “happy, loving” young woman’s life had unravelled after her 21-year-old husband Adil, a police officer, was shot dead in June while fighting to protect the Shi’ite town of Amerli from the Sunni terrorists.

“Nada did not see the body and…

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Dance of three

Dance lady


There are two of you.

Broad shouldered.

Firm to the touch.

Slowly taking each others clothes off.

First the shirts. Slowly button by button.

Slowly caressing the skin exposed by the buttons undone.

Hands rise to guide to the shirt off over the shoulders.

Gracefully they fall to the floor.

The tips of fingers gracefully float over the skin of the other.

Pinching lightly at the nipples.

Hands bring the other in for a deep and sensual kiss. Tongues dancing the dance of passion.

Hands at the waist band, buttons loosened, zippers fall, asses grabbed, bodies moving closer. The dance of tongues and hands continue.

My hands dance over my naked body as I watch the beauty of the dance.

As the dance continues to increase in it’s natural beat so does the dance of my hands on my body.

Your dance builds to you are both beyond desire and are now in a primal need for release in and of each other.

Fucking and sucking

Sucking and fucking

Over and over again.

Your cock in his ass

His cock in yours

It is a dance of fury until we scream the pleasure of our release.

Soon my dears,

You will take that same dance with the three of us not just the two of you

The Cherry Pops

Cherry Pop

Everyone’s first time is different.

For me, 5 months 2 days before my 30th birthday.

That’s when I gave my virginity to a lovely man.

I would also like to add that this was also the time for my first kiss as well. It was very wet. He caught me off guard, just put his hand around the back of my neck and pulled me in for it. We were in his car.

Though we had been talking online and on the phone for around 6 weeks, I think, we had only just met in real life that day.

Was it what I had hoped for? Yes and No

I had expected it to hurt, It didn’t. I literally felt a pop.

There was no bumbling or fumbling.

No shame

No pressure

No Embarrassment

It felt completely natural.

I did expect guy on top, But with a guy the size of my ex, that ain’t gonna happen.

For a man of his size you need to add pressure to the flesh on the pubis mound so the erect phallic member can protrude from it’s hidey hole.

I could go into more detail about who did what to who. But I’m keeping that for my own memory.

It was a lovely experience. Many first that day.

First time I got told they’d had enough.

Damn my Libido

Damn I miss his tongue